Strange But Serious Question

Last night at bath time Presley starting pinching her little - here's where my dilemma is, not sure what to call them - I guess her titties? and she was very curious about them. She said, "What's dis called???"

I totally drew a blank. You totally hear about what to call the other, but it has never crossed my mind to have a name for these.

So I'm asking, what do you tell kids this is called? I really want to know.

Hoodlums

Before I get to the McDonald's story I have to mention that this afternoon we were in Target and Presley points to a doormat that has Santa on it and says:

"There's Jesus!"

For the record, we go to church most Sundays, read from a children's Bible at home, and she attends a Christian Mother's Day Out. Not sure where the disconnect happened. Hmmm.

Anyway, on Sunday after church I took the kids to McDonald's since Daddy had to work. Presley was on the toddler slide when these two brothers, about 5 and 7, surround her and point their new Happy Meal Astro Boy toy at her and the older one says, "Shoot her!" and before I realize what was going on they launched their little plastic poles.

Rylan, about the same time as they were getting ready to aim, shoot, and fire, says, "That's my baby sister! Don't shoot at her!"

But they did anyway and they were ready to go for round two (by now Presley was looking more than a little uneasy) when I said, "Hey, that's my baby, and you may not shoot at her."

Let me also just mention here that these boys were looking at her with the most menacing looks and it really rubbed me the wrong way. They were literally ganging up on my little two-year-old girl.

So the older one gives me a really nasty look and says, "You're not the boss of me."

The grownup who brought this brat was not eating in the play area. I pretty much growled back, "I'm the boss when it comes to this baby, and you will NOT shoot her. If you have a problem with that you need to go talk to your parent."

A random dad sitting nearby said, "That's right!"

I stood in front of the play area the rest of the time and they just kept trying to push the envelope - they'd go right up near her to try to prove a point, daring me to say something. We left about 5 minutes later.

Stupid mean kids.

Weekend Update

So on Saturday I almost thought I had officially become "that mom." The flaky, lost-her-brain, undependable kind of mom. The kind I swore I'd never be.

We got Rylan's soccer schedule at the beginning of the season and I wrote all the times in on both my paper calendar and my phone. I knew the game this week was at noon, so at 11:52 we walk onto the soccer fields and look around for his team. No sign of them. After a few minutes we went to the concession stand to look at their schedule. Our team played at 10am.

Oh crap.

I screwed up.

And since we had to miss a practice and the last game due to Rylan's swine flu I really felt bad. There's only 5 kids on the team and 4 have to be on the field so it is exhausting when everyone's not there.

I literally felt sick. Rylan didn't seem to mind too much, so that was good. But Lance had driven all the way home from Arlington where he was doing some work just to go to the game and then planned to drive back. Wasted trip.

We got home and I looked at the calendar on the fridge. I was exonerated! The schedule says noon!!! Hurray!!! Then, of course, I became indignant.

I re-read the coach's email from Thursday saying practice was rained out (again) and saw a little mention of "Game at 10, field 5"at the very bottom, which did not grab my attention since there was no mention of a time change.

Turns out the coach lost the schedule she passed out to us so she goes to the league's website each week for the time of the game and apparently they changed it. Somehow I'm the only person who missed out on this fact, which is still beyond me.

Sometimes you just can't win.

I'll save my McDonald's story for tomorrow. I had to get medieval on a couple of hoodlums. Still getting worked up when I think about it. But right now I have to go give some baths.

Still Alive

Just a quick post to say that Yes, I am still alive.

Rylan had swine flu and then got a secondary infection. About the time he was recovering a week later, I came down with a nasty cold/cough and have been rendered incapable of an original thought, much less anything interesting enough to post in this blog.

So bear with me, hopefully I'll be back to my normal self in the next few days.

Little Moments

After yesterday's doomsday posting I figured I needed to follow it up with something more positive. This is mostly for my own personal records since I don't really write these things down any place else.

In the midst of all the rain, sickness, and boredom of the week, here are some memorable moments that I hope to store inside my memory so that I can retrieve them when my sweet angels turn into teenage hellions with major attitudes.

1. Presley has been wearing my black hoodie sweatshirt (actually, it has been wearing her) with the hood on her head and looking like the Grim Reaper. And she has to wear this each and every time she watches the Ralph's World DVD while she dances around to the songs. We have played this 14 minute video about 30 times or more this week. Excuse me, that's 30 times PER DAY. But she is just so darn cute while doing it. And getting some great exercise, too.

2. Rylan was showing me a family project he made at school. He pointed to each picture and said, "First, you're a baby. Then you grow to a kid. And then, (pointing to a picture of an adult) you turn into a human!" Well put.

3. Presley was looking into the Viewfinder that had a Mickey Mouse Clubhouse disc inside, and she kept squealing "Hi Mickey Mouse! Hi Mickey Mouse!" She was so excited. You probably had to be there.

4. I was getting ready to make them quesadillas for dinner tonight and Presley was shrieking with delight. Then she saw the candy bowl and said very seriously, "Mommy, I don't want a quesadilla. I just need a sucker."

5. Tonight the four of us were on the bed with the kids bouncing all around us (Rylan was on an upswing moment of his flu) and they were laughing hysterically and having a ball. My husband said to me, "Is this what you always dreamed about?" half sarcastic/half serious. And I had a flashback of sitting on this same bed seven years ago, crying my eyes out because I wanted kids so badly and was told it would be a hard road to get them due to fertility issues.

In the midst of all the "blah," my heart is so grateful. I hope I don't ever forget how lucky I truly am.

Blah

"Blah" pretty much sums up my week.

First of all, it has been raining here in the Dallas metroplex for like 40 days and 40 nights. Or something like that. Weather really affects my mood - is it just me? I hate that. I need sun. I would do so well in California. Except for all the fires, earthquakes, and mudslides. Never mind.

Second, the sick season is here. It's that time of year when you hold your plans loosely because chances are someone in your family is going to get sick and mess up said plans.

I was down for the count on Wednesday. It wasn't all bad though - it was a stomach bug that kept me home from work, but I was able to enjoy a quiet house while the kids were in school. I watched a movie on cable at 9:30 in the morning, gotta love that. I was fine by that night.

This morning I got all ready to drop Rylan off at school and go to the gym (2 weeks left on my membership) and run a couple errands. Fridays are my favorite - no work (meaning I can actually wake up naturally instead of at the crack of dawn), Presley/mommy alone time, Rylan's martial arts class at 5:00, then usually a high school football game with the fam. I packed his lunch, got everything together, went up to his room at 8:15 (unheard of for him, he's more like a 6:45 guy) and quickly discovered that he was sick. Mostly just fever/laying around.

So I took off my gym clothes and put my flannel pants and fuzzy socks on. I haven't stepped out of the house all day. I am going stir crazy.

You know what the hardest part of this day was, other than trying to stay sane? Trying to "be there" for my sick 5 year old when my needy 2 year old cries if I go into another room. I felt so guilty all day long because she demanded my full attention, pulling me from here to there. He was fine and I tried to give him spurts of attention when I could, but still.

And I've had a sore throat all day and that usually precedes some sort of nasty illness so I'm preparing myself. Hopefully not.

Also, I'm just so bored. I told my husband that I need something really fun to look forward to. And by fun, I don't mean a soccer game. He said, "Well, Christmas is almost here." It's not even mid-October, that's not really what I had in mind.

About an hour later he tells me that his friend is having a big 40th birthday party at this fancy restaurant in Dallas followed by everyone staying at a nice hotel. Now that's what I am talking about. A reason to get dressed up! An adult party at a non-kid-friendly locale! Yes! Why didn't you say so!

Of course, someone will probably get sick.

I Gotta Get Me Some Winkers

You know how much I love my designer jeans? Well, I just discovered this new brand that is totally going to transform the denim industry. We're talking a major jean revolution here. I've got to figure out who carries these...Saks? Neimans? Check out this video...